Persuasion
So far, I've looked at a fair bit of existentialism and general psych theories, but haven't looked at directly applicable strategies that you can use in your daily life. So, if that's what you're looking for, then you're in for a treat! Time for a few persuasion techniques!
First up is the Door-In-The-Face (DITF) technique. DITF technique is when you ask for something ridiculous, then back it off to what you really want. You bluff by pushing the person much further than they're willing to go, and much further than you need them to budge, followed by a 'compromise' of backing off and suggesting closer to what you're really requesting. An example of this would be if you needed to borrow $50 from a friend, who we'll name Bill. When you first approach Bill, you ask him to lend you $100, which he'll refuse. You say "Fine! How about just lending me $50?", far increasing your chances of borrowing money from Bill than if you walked up and asked for $50 straight up because it appears you've made a huge compromise, and it's much smaller than you originally requested.
Next is the Foot-In-The-Door (FITD) technique. FITD builds off of a psychological principle of consistency. Consistency can be seen as building off of our personal concepts and cognitive dissonance; when we do something, we view ourselves as people who do that activity. The more we do something, the more incorporated into our self-concept that is. When we do something that breaks that new self-concept, or we know we're doing something we shouldn't be doing, we feel cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is an uncomfortable feeling when you hold two conflicting ideas simultaneously, which can only be resolved by mentally resolving the conflict. An example of this would be smokers: they know they smoke, they do it on the daily. They realize that it may end up killing them, and, at the very least, is not at all beneficial to them. Most people don't like to view themselves as self-harming, so this would challenge that assumption. They have two options: quit smoking, or challenge the assumption that it's harming to smoke. Which do you find is more common? Anyway, the skinny on consistency is that people to keep in line with their self-concepts, therefore, if you get them to do one thing, they're more likely to do a similar thing that is in line with that original act. For example, ask to borrow $5, then pay them back. They will start building a concept of seeing themselves as someone who lends money - more importantly, they will view themselves as someone who lends money to you in particular. If your ultimate goal is to borrow the acclaimed $50 from Bill, then borrowing and paying back that $5 earlier will make him more likely to lend you an even larger amount. Hurray!
Now, this last one may seem a little cynical, but bear with me. In order to get anyone to do anything, you must get them to want to do it. There is no other way. None. I repeat, you must make them want to do it. How do you get someone to want to do something? The first - and only - way I'm going to be covering is to open up, foremost, by telling them how whatever you're wanting is going to benefit them. Quite obvious, right? Obvious or not, people seem to try to sell their points by explaining why they, the seller, want something. Why should the buyer care? Think of the last time you did something for someone else: was it out of pity for their situation? Or was it for some sort of personal gain, tangible or not? My main point is that the mass majority of people are going to be far more persuaded into doing or wanting something by seeing how it will help them than by pleading to them to take pity on you or giving your reasons why you want it.
Keep these things in mind and try them in practice when you next want something from someone else, which will be soon. Give them a shot, I promise you won't be disappointed!
Bonus: The sweetest sound anyone can ever hear is their own name. Keep this in mind when you're trying to get on someone's good side!
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